Do you believe in the so called boy girl friendship? And to what extent do you think should it lead to? I am a friendly person per say, but I do try to limit my friendships when they come to the opposite sex.
What I mean by limiting is that I try not breaking all boundaries. Yes, it is partly because I am a married lady, but I do believe I’ve been like this all along. Before getting married, my hubby and I were friends first. He claims it took a while till I actually opened up to him and actually began trusting him. You have to be careful when choosing any friend in general, its just natural I guess. But my topic here today is whether single or with someone, how far should your friendship with the other sex go? Would you go out alone, have late night calls, …etc
You really have to think of it from both vantages. I mean say you have this really close girl/guy friend and then you hook up, get engaged or married to someone, what happens to that friendship of yours with the first person? Or say your significant other has the same situation going on, would you be ok with their friendship staying as close as it is? Am I being clear enough?
Sometimes such friendships could get out of hand, they may even cross the friendship line. I know I wouldn’t be so pleased knowing my hubby had some other girl he felt comfortable talking to other than me and vice versa. Now this might differ from east to west but I really wish it didn’t because relationships are supposed to all be the same.
I know a lot of people may be relating to this at the moment, but no matter how much your friendship with that other sex may seem important, its really not worth jeopardising your relationship for. Ethically the other end should back off once you become taken, but should that not happen you should initiate it.
A lot of people say that there is no such thing as a boy girl friendship. I see where they’re coming from, but does it really apply to all friendships? Let me know what you think…
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Actually I am not so “Shaikh” but I always think that Islam rule is the first. I always tried to find a way to get over this but it always came to be not true. I have no problem with having girl friends, talk to them and discuss but not to go out with, or to talk in things that only married couple discuss. When it become “Love” and a future plan of marriage has been announced then I think there is no problem to continue in a relation but when I feel inside that we cannot be together or marry then why to make friendship?
I accept in the friendship in work or university ONLY because simply I have clear rules in my religion and society and i cannot jump over them at all.
It’s not about open-mind at all .. it’s about life and religion.
Sorry if the ideas in my comment are not mentioned that well.
by the way, congratulations on your new blog.. very cool design
so you agree with having limits, i think thats the healthiest kind of friendships. i call this playing it safe =D thank you for sharing
Well,
For me, I have a lot of male-friends… I find it great… I treat them in da same way I treat my girl friends in… With some exceptions.
But still, I’m not with hanging out with a male friend alone for more than once… sometimes it happen, like a random hang out… but not to manage for such a thing frequently… I don’t mind group-hanging out… They’re much better and comforting.
About late night phone calls, I’m against them at all levels.
I’m not in relation but yet, I still think that it won’t be okay with even a guy wants to ask me for a serious relation. I’m trying my best to be conscious.
Because in anyway, after breaking the limits it’ll bring out some bad consequences and we’ll be losing this friendship most of the time.
I still have a lot in mind, but I guess it’s enough for today
hehehe please feel free to speak your mind… everyone should have friends from both genders, as long as you keep a few barriers as you said. but about friendship turning into something more, don’t always reject them, because that is how i met my husband. We were best friends and then it turned into what we are today.
you never know who you’re destined to be with =D
I’ll take with ur advice then
You seem a great couple
Allah y7fazkom